Rested, Yet Restless.

Her name is Tina.

“So, who are your youngest clients?” I asked, trying to strike up a conversation to ease the awkward moment.

“I’ve had clients who are around 17 years old who come.  The youngest so far is a 16-year old.”

And I thought I was waaay too young to be doing this.  The palms of her hands were really smooth, probably a result of years of experience.  Next thing I knew, she was pressing my forehead down, as though trying to sink my head into the pillow.  She turned on some electrical thing, with a faint buzzing sound, but I couldn’t see because it was dark and yes, my eyes were shut tight.  I could only pray it doesn’t do any damage.

Then, I felt a bright light hovering over me and when I opened my eyes to take a peek, I thought I was blinded.  I wonder if that’s how seeing God is like.  Tina started pressing really hard on my nose, squeezing it as if it was some kind of Play-Doh, before proceeding to the bottom of my chin and random areas of my face.

“You don’t sound like you’re local,” she asked after a long breach of silence, as my nose silently pleaded for mercy.  Turning off the light, she continued, “When you spoke English with your mom you had a very nice accent, not the fake types, but the genuine kind – like you’ve lived in overseas before.”

Thinking how to answer all that in Hokkien (our conversations are in Hokkien, by the way), I replied under the pressure of her fingertips, “That’s how I speak normally, I don’t know where that accent came from.  It’s been there since I was young.  People call me a banana because I’m poor in Chinese.”

“Oh?  So you’re pure Chinese?  Your mom and dad are locals?  I see!  And you don’t look Malaysian, more Eurasian.  And you definitely don’t look 20, I thought you were waiting for your SPM results!”

It was hard for me to smile so I just let out a chuckle.  Next she put a cloth over my face and started applying some kind of goo.  She muttered something like “mask” and so I laid still.  Mom came in not long after and they both started talking as if I wasn’t there.  You know, those “About my daughter” talks.

She started applying some massage oil on me and …


Holy crap!!  Was that my finger???  My left thumb laid there lifeless as my other fingers went through the torment.  I could not frown nor open my mouth to say a thing because there’s a frigging cloth and mask over my face!!!  I felt like a tortured paralyzed person while my right arm awaited in fear.


My hands went numb.  And for awhile I doubted if they were still attached to me.

She proceeded to my shoulders and commented, “My my, you’re so tensed!  So stressed!  You need to loosen up!”

Yeah do the same thing to my shoulders as you did to my fingers and I’ll so loosen up.  Detached too.

Once the mask was taken off and my face was slathered with a few more layers of something-that-I-don’t-know, I was ready to go.  Strangely, despite thinking I was going to be killed right there and then, I felt good.  Like you know, more loosened up.

Thanked Tina, made payment, and left.

And that, was Kooky’s first facial treatment.  Wow.


12 Responses to Rested, Yet Restless.

  1. Hehe. Why no pics of Kooky post-facial? 😉

  2. ilene ong says:

    Congratulations on your FIRST facial treatment! Next you should go for the makeover (inclusive of photography) at those cosmetic promotions. Take your mum along.

    Incidentally Vern, were you on today’s NTV7 show entitled “Deal or No Deal”? I saw one of the audience who looked like you!

  3. lynnx01 says:

    I did once.. it was sooooo long and I thought my contacts would be fused to my eyeballs when I was buried under some kinda thingy. Traumatising. Hehe.

  4. _butt says:

    hahah! well, no pain, no gain eh? 😛

  5. swee yen says:

    yessss photos mana???? your blog is never complete without those photos!! =)

  6. Pamela says:

    hey vern.

    nice. hehe first facial. lucky they din squeeze ur face till ur face has spots all over!

  7. kookymonsta says:

    Kenny, Swee Yen, no lah – the whole time there I was lying still like a board, how to take photo??? And after? Well, it’s a lil bit too late for that now, eh? Haha! I take a lot of photos of various stuff but an upclose shot of my face is a little too vain for me to handle. 🙂

    Ilene, now don’t push it! Lol! Even this whole facial thing was first done with a little reluctance. Hehehe… Nope, that person wasn’t me. Already back in campus lo!!

    Lynn, hahaha! You arh… By right they should first ask you if you wear any contact lenses before proceeding.. I know mine did.

    _butt, the things women (and men) would do for the sake of appearance…

    Pamela, hey! Pam from highschool? Sorry, I know quite a lot of Pamelas.. so you need to let me know haha! Ya wei, when she was squeezing I thought “Gone lah my face…” but turns out OK. She’s good at it I guess. 🙂

  8. mel says:

    fuyohh… my shepherd gone for facial. ahaha
    new bright and shiny face for a new sem huh.. =p

  9. Hui Ling says:

    LOL!! a facial, vern? haha must have been one hell of an experience! XD

  10. cleffairy says:

    I fear facial the same way I fear hairdresser… OMG…. I’m convinced that they are as horrible as those awful dentists!

  11. kookymonsta says:

    mel, haha, next I’ll toss you into the washing machine so that you can have shiny white wool too! 😉

    Hui Ling, yea wei, definitely one experience I’ll never forget. Scary yet exciting at the same time.

    Clef, I don’t think they’re as bad as dentists, at least the aftermath leaves you feeling good, and not shaken to your knees. Bitter-sweet experience, really. 🙂

  12. zen says:

    omg woman.

    you made it sound sooooo like a torturous-thing-to-do. go a few more times, and you’ll start loving and adoring the relaxation. i brought my guy friend for facial ones also. eheh. you should see his face. damn funny and hilarious and he was screaming away in the other room when the aunty was poking on his nose.

    and. btw. when there’s a first, there’s always a second one. yippppeeee!!! looking forward. eheh.

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